Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Pam Hillman: Wallflower Writer to the Rescue

When I’m invited to blog with someone, I like to visit their home on the web and browse around for a bit. What sets their blog apart from others? What makes my host or hostess special?

Visiting Cheryl’s blog made me feel warm, cozy, and welcome. Her historical book covers made me want to click on each one of them to read the stories inside. Even the title of her blog, From the Heart, sends a warm inviting message.

It was easy to come right on in and sit a spell.

Isn’t that what we all want? Someone to invite us in, make us feel welcome, let us know deep down inside that we have worth, that we mean something to them and to those we come in contact with?

Have you ever been somewhere where you felt out of place? Maybe in a group setting where it seems like everyone has paired off in groups chatting, connecting, having fun, but you feel left out, maybe even unwanted?

I don’t know about you, but I have. As a matter of fact, when I was younger, I felt like that most of the time. I was a shy, introverted, gangly teenager. I got tongue-tied around strangers and rarely initiated conversation. I preferred solitude and books.

So, what changed?

First, I owe the nudge to actually come out of my shell to my employer of 28 years. I went from office worker, to payroll clerk, to office manager, to purchasing manager where I was forced to talk to salesmen (Strangers. Eeek!!) on the phone and in person constantly. It was one of the best things that ever happened to me.

My newfound confidence spilled over into my writing life as well.

I started focusing on others instead of myself. At least once or twice at ACFW conference meals I look for a table where I know no one. I started this practice at the RWA conventions years ago. Instead of stressing that I couldn’t find any of my friends among 2000 writers, I found new friends. Okay, at ACFW, it’s getting harder and harder for me to meet a stranger. Just sayin’

In large group settings where people are milling about, I don’t hug the wall, avoiding eye-contact with other people who are avoiding eye-contact with me. I make it a point to mingle. I smile, catch the eye of those standing or sitting alone. I try not to be pushy: if they’re waiting for someone and their friend shows up, I move on, looking for another vict…uh…lonely-looking person.

I’ve been rescuing wallflower writers for close to fifteen years. But, really, if truth be told, who’s rescuing who?

Pam is thrilled to announce the release of her second novel,
Claiming Mariah
To celebrate, Pam is giving away two eReaders
(choice of Kindle Wi-Fi, 6" Display, or Nook Simple Touch)
Two Winners: One on Facebook. Facebook Drawing: Kindle/Nook Giveaway
One through Pam’s Newsletter. Newsletter: Pam’s newsletter. 

Registering both places is not required but will double your chances of winning. Also keep in mind that you will receive updates more often being connected on Facebook than through the newsletter. Just sayin’

Contest runs from January 1st until March 31st, 2013.
And....that’s not all! There will be prizes offered randomly throughout the tour.

Pam is especially excited about this week’s giveaway:

January 11th: Blogging with Catherine Terry

January 15th: Blogging with Rose McCauley


  1. Cheryl, thank you for inviting me to your blog today. And I wasn't kidding. You definitely know how to make someone feel welcome. Thank you! :)

  2. Pam, the more I learn about you the more I think we're twins separated at birth. I'm a huge wallflower, but back in 09 I had this brilliant idea to not sit with my friends at RWA. Completely out of my box. I met some really nice people.

    1. That is just too funny! Then I'm not totally wacky, am I? It's actually kind of fun when you deliberately choose to befriend other wallflowers.

      Very empowering! :)

      Christina, we need to wear some kind of flower at ACFW so people will know who we are. We could be Wallflowers Anonymous! lol

  3. Loved this, Pam!!!!
    Jackie S.

    1. Thank you, Jackie! So glad you stopped by! Bless you!

  4. Congrats on your new release Pam. It sounds really good and I will be looking for this book. Thanks so much for sharing.

    1. Quilt Lady, thank you. It's so good to see you here. I just hate that I wasn't around earlier in the day.

      Computer glitches scare me spitless!!! I've come to depend on my trusty laptop SO much!

  5. What a great post, Pam. I never think of you as a wallflower, but then we know each other pretty well.

    1. Ah, but Mary, you didn't know me way back when! lol

  6. I'm 50+ and still tongue-tied around strangers, especially walking into a meeting that's already started. Nothing sweeter than spending an evening in front of the fireplace getting lost in a fantastic book. Great post, Pam. And, Cheryl, love your blog! :-)

    1. Thank you, Dora! I need to do a little redecorating now that Christmas is past, but I so love the holiday cheer.

    2. Dora, I know what you mean. I also wanted to mention that if you find the Seekers in the lobby of the hotel at the ACFW conference, it's open party time to everyone! No exclusions.

      So, you cruise the room, wondering which group you can attach yourself to without feeling like a 5th or 20th wheel? The Seekers! Come one, come all, and have a ball.

  7. Pam I totally chuckled at this line " I move on, looking for another vict…uh…lonely-looking person."

    I love meeting new people one on one at conferences. Groups, well those terrify me.

    Congratulations on your latest release. I already own it!!!!

    1. Tina, sometimes it's a toss-up on whether the deer-caught-in-the-headlights look is one of "thank you, you have rescued me from a night of boredom" or one of "oh, no, how in the world am I ever going to get away from this crazy woman who's latched herself on to me???" lol

  8. First, I want to apologize for not being able to comment today. With the Java scare, and my laptop acting all wonky, I did a backup, deleted cookies, updated windows, poured bleach on the keyboard.

    Everything seems to be running much smoother now, but I hated got throw perfectly good cookies out. Oh well!

    Thank you all for your patience! Off to read everybody's comments!

    1. I have no clue how the word "got" got in there...that was supposed to say "I hated TO throw out perfectly good cookies."

      Maybe my computer is still wonky!

      Or maybe it's just me.

      No comments from Mary & Tina!

  9. Hi, Pam! I love the cover of your new novel! It reminds me so much of the Grand Canyon and other state parks I have visited with such beautiful scenery!

    Thanks so much for the fabulous giveaway and best of luck to you.

    Connie Fischer